One Month-- Oh My!

I'd like to say that I haven't written in a month because I got locked in a tower because I fell in love with a prince who my evil step father didn't approve of and so I grew my hair so long that he had to climb up my hair to rescue me from the tower, and by the time he got up there, I was so skinny that my size 6 sevens slid down my hips and we made magical tower love and lived happily ever after.

But that didn't happen. I met a jerky guy and had a 3 1/2 week long relationship and Seven doesn't make jeans in my size and I don't have hips, all I have is mid-terms and residual annoyance from a 7 stupid dates with a stupid guy.

At least I lost 6 pounds this month.


Let me tell you about Al. Al is pretty. Al is a pretty California boy who loves his dog, and surfing and Frasier. (Frasier!?-- wtf) He smokes clove cigarettes and has silver hair. His skin is tan, almost brown, but his eyes are light. Our first date he told me that he could fall for me. Our second date, he told me that he was falling for me. Our third date, he told me that he fell for me. Our fourth date he bought me a watch-- it was a shrek watch from burger king, but still, a watch.
Our fifth date he gave me a key to his apartment. Our sixth date he told me that he was beginning to feel overwhelmed. Our seventh date he told me that his ex-girlfriend wanted to get back together. There was no eighth date. Just an email telling me that he was confused and overwhelmed and he thinks that we shouldn't see each other any more. That was 5 days ago.

I'm confused.

I don't understand men.

I have mid-terms.

I miss Charleston Chews.